Aside from one intensely unhappy week back around 1995 or thereabouts, I have proudly worn a full beard for two decades now. That’s not an easy thing when you live in a community that places a high value on conformity, and where the local ideal of how a respectable male is supposed to look hasn’t changed significantly since the Eisenhower Administration.
I’ve had girls tell me they wouldn’t go out with me because I have a beard.
I once had an interviewer ask me to shave it off in exchange for a minimum-wage job working essentially alone in a warehouse, where nobody would ever see me. I’ve had other interviewers who haven’t said a word, but who’ve visibly lost interest in me as soon as they got a good look at my face. On one memorable occasion, I was told not to even bother filling out an application until I came back “presentable.” (I told that doughy-faced spud-nugget what he could do with his discriminatory and frankly chickenshit application process.)
And I’ve put up with sidelong glances and silent disapproval from countless fellow Utahns, who can’t say why, exactly, but just know that there’s something wrong with men who have beards.
The irony, of course, is that many of this state’s founders were impressively bearded themselves. No less a figure than Brigham Young sported a mustache-less Quaker-style beard in his latter days (forgive me, I couldn’t resist). Presidents of the Mormon Church Lorenzo Snow and Joseph F. Smith — not to be confused with his uncle, the Joseph Smith who founded the Church — were both approaching ZZ Top territory with their lengthy neckwarmers. And Brother Brigham’s righthand man, the infamous gunfighter Porter Rockwell, would’ve fit right in with the Allman Brothers Band. But I guess that kind of glorious hirsuteness went out with polygamy and the coming of statehood.
If I sound bitter, well, it’s sometimes hard not to be. After all, I’m a nice guy, and I’ve always kept my facial fuzz neat and clean. My beard is a symbol of my individuality and masculinity, and also kind of a family tradition to boot — my father has worn a beard most of my life, as did my uncle Louie, the one who died from ALS. And damn it, I just like how I look with it better than the way I do without it.
I’ve long comforted myself by rationalizing that the rampant beardism I so often encounter is just a parochial Utah thing, that things are surely different out there beyond the Zion Curtain. And you know what? I was right:
A recent study in the Journal of Marketing Communications found that men with beards were deemed more credible than those who were clean-shaven. … The researchers say the implications of their findings could extend far beyond advertisements. For instance, male politicians might want to consider not shaving because the “presence of a beard on the face of candidates could boost their charisma, reliability, and above all their expertise as perceived by voters, with positive effects on voting intention.”
More credible? Charisma, reliability, and expertise? Now that’s more like it! But perhaps you’re not yet convinced. In that case, consider this chart:
You’ll have to click on it to blow it up large enough to read; be prepared to scroll, it’s pretty big. And after you’ve clicked and pondered, then tell me you don’t have a new-found respect for my beard. Go on, just tell me. Because charts prove everything, right?
Some guys wear beards well. Other guys look like the beard is wearing them. I, for one, could never sport a beard – my facial hair comes in rough & scraggly and never really gets long enough to be considered a beard. As such, my wife and kids have made it very clear that I must remain clean shaven (doesn’t stop me from cheating on the weekends, though).
All of that said, random discrimination sucks. Shaving your beard wouldn’t change a thing about who you are or what you’re capable of doing, so the folks you describe above are simply being ridiculous.
Shaving your beard wouldn’t change a thing about who you are or what you’re capable of doing, so the folks you describe above are simply being ridiculous.
That’s what I’ve always believed. Still, there is a real entrenched prejudice against facial hair (and long hair, too, another idiosyncrasy of mine that’s occasionally caused some problems) in these parts. It’s not as bad now that I’m older and have finally managed to find myself a more creative and cosmopolitan workplace, but I’ve experienced a lot of frustration and hurt feelings over the years.
I guess that’s what I get for being contrary and insisting on doing my own thing. 😉
Just for the record, I’ve always had a fondness for beards and mustaches… but then, my dad wore a mustache the whole time I was growing up. (I often asked him why he didn’t grow a full beard, and he told me it itched too much; he could never stand it long enough to get it long enough.)
And I’d be considered part of the religious majority around here. I don’t know what those discriminators are thinking. Beards are cool.
Ah, thank you, Jen. 🙂
I know not all Mormons have a problem with beards, but I’ve encountered plenty who do. I chalk it up to the Utah-Mormon culture, as opposed to the actual faith, which as we know are often two entirely different things.
I actually have a pretty funny story about beardism… my neighbor when I was growing up used to give my dad a lot of grief for wearing a beard, suggesting that it was unclean, undignified, etc. He never came out and said it, but he managed to imply pretty heavily that his problem with it was that Mormons don’t typically have them, and Dad ought to live up to the neighbor’s standards. One day, Dad decided he’d had enough, and he pointed out to the neighbor that Jesus is always depicted with a beard.
The neighbor never said another word about it.
I would like to know when and how the discrimination began, though, and why it endures.
Jas, I can honestly say the “discrimination” isn’t any different here then in other parts of the country.
As one who’s traveled across the country extensively for business, there are certain demographics, be it corporate professional, blue collar, artist, religious person, etc., that are no different than the environment here and you’ll find the same people wearing or not wearing the same types of facial hair.
The fact that Utah is a very corporate and religious centric state, plays into the majority preference of the “clean shaven-ish” look as would any other state with the same demographic.
Well, Cheno, this certainly isn’t worth having an argument over, but let’s just say I’ve had a somewhat different experience than you. I don’t doubt that similar discrimination can and does occur outside of Utah — and it is a form of discrimination, so putting it in quote marks is disingenuous on your part — but I daresay it’s more widespread here than in more cosmopolitan areas, and it is very much connected to the culture of the Church. On the handful of occasions I (or my father) have gotten people to be honest about it, they’ve as much as said so.
And it’s not like the job interviews I referenced above were for Goldman Sachs or IBM, either. The employer who told me not to apply unless I shaved was a ski resort, hardly the sort of place you’d expect to encounter that kind of conservatism.
With all due respect, this is one of those things you just don’t see because you’re an insider. When it comes to stuff like this, we live in different worlds, pal.
Um, shouldn’t that title say “Whom Do You Trust?” ?
Perhaps your beard is to blame. (Just kidding!)
You’re on one today, aren’t you, Karen? 🙂