The last few entries have been a little on the grim and/or grouchy side, so why don’t we try a nice, pleasant meme? The meme fad seems to be in decline these days, but SamuraiFrog somehow continues to stumble across them; here’s one I spotted over at his place a few days ago, which he called the “Child of (Too Much) TV meme.”
It’s a long list of TV-show titles, to which you are supposed to do the following:

Rules:
– Bold all of the following TV shows of which you’ve ever seen 3 or more episodes in your lifetime.
– Italicize a show if you’re positive you’ve seen every episode of it.

Me being me, I shall of course add the occasional comment as we go along. Shall we begin?

• 24
  I followed 24 faithfully through the first five seasons, but I finally gave up on it midway through the sixth year. I just couldn’t take it anymore. The creative well had long since run dry, the plots had become repetitive and increasingly ridiculous, and my disgust over our country’s real-life torture policies left me unable to watch Jack Bauer kneecapping people in every other episode. I’ve rarely been put off a TV show because of politics, but in this case, the ideology being expressed through the storylines finally became too uncomfortable for me to rationalize away.

• 7th Heaven
• ALF
• Alias
  Loved the first season, but lost the thread of the story in the second year after missing a couple episodes. That’s the drawback to the heavily serialized modern drama.

• American Gothic
• America’s Next Top Model
• Angel
• Arrested Development
• Babylon 5
• Batman: The Animated Series
• Battlestar Galactica (the old one)
• Battlestar Galactica (the new one)
  I believe my feelings on new vs. old Galactica are pretty well-known, but just for the sake of conversation, I tried. I really, honestly tried to enjoy the remake. But after six episodes, I still hadn’t found a single character I actually liked and the relentlessly grim tone was wearing on me, so I gave up. Yes, I know the premise was grim even in the original, but I prefer a little more devil-may-care in my space opera, thank you.

• Baywatch
• Beverly Hills 90210 (original)
• Bewitched
• Bonanza
• Bones
  One of The Girlfriend’s favorites. I have nothing against it, but I haven’t been able to get into it, for some reason.

• Bosom Buddies
• Boston Legal
• Boy Meets World
• Brothers And Sisters
• Buffy the Vampire Slayer
• Californication
• Chappelle’s Show
• Charlie’s Angels
• Charmed
• Cheers
• Chuck
• Clarissa Explains it All
• Columbo
• Commander in Chief
• Crossing Jordan
• CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
  The show is past its prime now and I’m no longer following it regularly, but CSI is one of those stand-bys I will always turn to if there’s nothing else on. I like the cast and the show’s style, and I was even fortunate enough to visit the set a couple years ago. However, I’ve grown very tired of the forensic-procedural sub-genre it inspired, and neither of its two spin-offs ever grabbed my socks.

• CSI: Miami
  This is the worst of the three CSIs, as far as I’m concerned. The dialogue is downright painful, David Caruso is apparently limited to three body poses and one facial expression, and overall it just feels much more superficial than the other two.

• CSI: NY
• Curb Your Enthusiasm
• Dark Angel
• Dark Skies
• DaVinci’s Inquest
• Dawson’s Creek
• Dead Like Me
• Deadwood
• Degrassi: The Next Generation
  I remember watching the Degrassi Junior High way back in the day, but I’ve never seen — or was even aware of — this spin-off.

• Designing Women
• Desperate Housewives
• Dexter
• Dharma & Greg
  I had a major crush on Jenna Elfman for a while, which certainly boosted the appeal of this silly but endearing sitcom, but the real pleasure of the series was the title characters’ respective parents, played by Susan Sullivan, Mitch Ryan, Mimi Kennedy, and Alan Rachins. I especially enjoyed the later episodes when Ryan and Rachins, playing the rich guy and the hippie respectively, became buddies who helped each other get around the demands of their wives.

• Different Strokes
• Doctor Who
  I don’t think it’s possible for anyone to have seen every episode of Doctor Who, given that the series has been around for over 40 years (not counting a decade off for good behavior), and many early episodes have been lost. Still, I’m certain I’ve seen the majority of what is available. My first Doctor, like most Americans of my general age I’d guess, was number four, Tom Baker, and he remains my sentimental favorite to this day. One of these days, I’ll have to do a proper appreciation of this show…

• Dragnet
• Due South
• ER
• Everwood
• Everybody Loves Raymond
• Facts of Life
• Family Guy
  I keep watching this and trying to figure out how it stays on the air, and why so many people think it’s so bloody funny. So far, I can’t answer either question.

• Farscape
• Fawlty Towers
• Felicity
• Firefly
  Not too difficult to have seen the entire series, considering there’s only 13 episodes!

• Frasier
• Freaks & Geeks
• Friends
  I’ve seen quite a few eps of this one, but honestly I never liked it much. I didn’t think it was funny, and I resented the media’s constant claims in the show’s early days that it was somehow representative of my generation. My life didn’t remotely resemble what you saw on Friends… and neither did anyone else’s. None of these people had reliable jobs and yet they lived in places bigger than my 1927 farmhouse… in Manhattan? And yet they never worried about making the rent? Yeah, right…

• Fringe
• Futurama
  One of those shows that I’ve never been able to love as much as I feel like I ought to.

• Get Smart
• Gilligan’s Island
• Gilmore Girls
• Gossip Girl
• Grey’s Anatomy
• Grange Hill
  Don’t even know what this is.

• Growing Pains
• Gunsmoke
• Happy Days
• Hercules: the Legendary Journeys
  Dumb fun that always reminded me of the Ray Harryhausen movies I loved as a kid. I can’t recall a single storyline from the however-many seasons this was on the air, but I miss it…

• Heroes
• Home Improvement
• Homicide: Life on the Street
• House
• I Dream of Jeannie
• I Love Lucy
• Invader Zim
• Invasion
• Hell’s Kitchen
• JAG
• Jackass
  Arg. Never saw a single installment, but the mere idea that this exercise in stupidity had (has?) a following fills me with despair.

• Joey
• Kim Possible
• Knight Rider
• Knight Rider: 2008
• Kung Fu
• Kung Fu: The Legend Continues
• La Femme Nikita
• LA Law
• Laverne and Shirley
• Law and Order
• Law and Order: SVU
• Law and Order: CI
• Leverage
• Little House on the Prairie
  You may not believe it, considering the types of ’70s-vintage shows I usually enthuse over, but this was a favorite in the Bennion home when I was growing up. Well, my mom and I liked it, anyhow; Dad thought it was dumb. For a long time, I had it in my head that the show was somehow about Utah, since everybody dressed like the folks in our local Pioneer Day parade, and I’d seen small Utah towns that looked a lot like Walnut Grove.

• Lizzie McGuire
• Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman
• Lost
  Big final season coming up. I’m steeling myself for the inevitable disappointment of however this thing is going to end following such a drawn-out tease…

• Lost in Space
• M*A*S*H
  M*A*S*H and Star Trek are the only two shows I’ve seen so many times that I can identify any particular episode within the first few seconds…

• MacGyver
• Malcolm in the Middle
• Married… With Children
  Once a “must-see” for me, I recently caught an episode on The Girlfriend’s cable and didn’t laugh once. Go figure.

• McLeod’s Daughters
• Melrose Place
• Miami Vice
  I lost interest after the first two seasons — the look and tone of the show changed pretty drastically in S3 — but the things everyone remembers about Vice came from those years anyhow.

• Mission: Impossible
• Mod Squad
• Monk
• Mork & Mindy
• Murphy Brown
• My Life As A Dog
• My Three Sons
  Ugh. One of the lamest, unfunniest sitcoms ever, with characters so eye-bleedingly square and wholesome (well, except for old Uncle Charley; I have my concerns about him and young Ernie) that they make freakin’ Beaver Cleaver look like a hippie. It still plays nightly on a local station that’s owned by BYU.

• My Two Dads
• Mythbusters
• NCIS
• Ned Bigby’s Declassified School Survival Guide
  The what now?

• Nip/Tuck
• Numb3rs
• One Tree Hill
• Oz
• Perry Mason
  One of my mom’s longstanding favorites, this also runs nightly on KBYU. It’s very different from modern courtroom shows, but I enjoy watching it with her from time to time.

• Power Rangers
• Press Gang
• Prison Break
  First season was excellent. After the main characters actually broke out, though, the writers clearly had no clue of what to do next and the show quickly dissolved into nonsense. This sort of thing is why I wish American TV producers could forget about exploiting a popular brand and just plan to tell a definite story within a set number of episodes, and when the story is finished, it’s finished. Period. In a sense, I guess I’m asking for a revival of the old mini-series concept, in which a story would play out over six or a dozen hours or whatever, and then come to definite conclusion.

• Private Practice
• Privileged
• Profiler
• Project Runway
• Psych
• Pushing Daisies
• Quantum Leap
  One of my favorites back in the day, but I haven’t seen any of it in years. I find myself wondering if it would still work for me…

• Queer As Folk (US)
• Queer as Folk (UK)
• ReGenesis
• Remington Steele
• Rescue Me
• Road Rules
• ROME
• Roseanne
  Wow, has such a likable show ever gone so thoroughly to hell as this one did in its later seasons?

• Roswell
• Sanctuary
• Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?
• Scrubs
• Seaquest DSV
  Man, talk about a disappointment…

• Seinfeld
• Sex and the City
• Six Feet Under
• Slings and Arrows
• Smallville
• So Weird
• South of Nowhere
• South Park
• Spongebob Squarepants
• St. Elsewhere
• Star Trek
• Star Trek: The Next Generation
• Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
• Star Trek: Voyager
• Star Trek: Enterprise
  As I stated earlier, I’ve still got the original Trek memorized, and I was a faithful viewer of both Next Gen and DS9. But the franchise started losing me with Voyager, a tiresome exercise in hitting the reset button at the end of every week’s episode. I only caught about every sixth episode of this series because I simply didn’t care. And then came Enterprise, and I cared even less. I think I watched the premiere of that one. Maybe. I didn’t watch anything else.

• Stargate Atlantis
• Stargate SG-1
  I’ve enjoyed both of these Stargate series (and I’m currently enjoying the latest variant, Stargate: Universe), but I’ve never followed them faithfully. Just whenever I manage to catch an ep.

• Starsky & Hutch
• Superman
  I’m assuming this refers to the old George Reeves series from the ’50s, which I remember watching as a kid.

• Supernatural
• Surface
• Survivor
  Yeah, I watched that first season along with the rest of America. It was an interesting novelty at first, but it quickly wore out its welcome, and these days I mostly curse it for saddling us with years of lame “unscripted” television populated by superficial, conniving pretty people looking for their 15 minutes. Oh, and maybe a little exhibitionistic booty along the way. No, thank you.

• Taxi
• Teen Titans
• That 70’s Show
  Another great series that went on too long instead of wrapping up at a pre-planned, logical concluding point (high school graduation, or Eric and Donna getting married)? Instead, it went on and on through various dippy plot developments until Topher Grace finally bailed altogether, and then the show got really lame for the final season. Sigh. At least it gave us the transcendent wisdom of Red Foreman.

• That’s So Raven
• The 4400
• The Addams Family
• The Amazing Race
  I stuck with this one much longer than Survivor, but it’s gotten very old…

• The Andy Griffith Show
  A perennial favorite in the Bennion home, the early black-and-white seasons are much better than the later color ones. Once Don Knotts left, the tone shifted from warm ‘n’ folksy to just plain dumb, and Andy became grumpy after realizing he was surrounded by idiots.

• The A-Team
• The Avengers
• The Beverly Hillbillies
• The Big Bang Theory
• The Brady Bunch
• The Cosby Show
• The Daily Show
• The Dead Zone
• The Dick Van Dyke Show
• The Flintstones
• The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
• The Golden Girls
• The Honeymooners
• The Jeffersons
• The Jetsons
• The L Word
• The Love Boat
• The Magnificent Seven
• The Mary Tyler Moore Show
• The Monkees
• The Munsters
• The Office (US)
  I saw it once. I didn’t understand what the fuss is all about. Not funny to me.

• The Powerpuff Girls
• The Pretender
• The Real World
• The Shield
• The Simpsons
  Haven’t watched it, aside from the annual Halloween show, in years. At its peak, though… wow. Simply brilliant.

• The Six Million Dollar Man
  Why isn’t this on DVD yet? Seriously, why? We’ve got frickin’ My Three Sons on DVD, but not the adventures of Steve Austin. There’s something deeply wrong with that…

• The Sopranos
• The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
• The Twilight Zone
• The Waltons
• The West Wing
• The Wonder Years
  Loved this series. Damn the music-industry suits and their licensing nonsense for keeping this trapped in no-DVD limbo!

• The X-Files
  I never really believed “the truth was out there.” That is, I didn’t think the writers had an endpoint in mind, and I’ve never liked being jerked around. (So why do I watch Lost then? I’ll get back to you after watching the final season…)

• Third Watch
• Three’s Company
  Dumb show, but the unprudish sexual attitudes of the ’70s seem weirdly wholesome nowadays, and make me regret missing out on those carefree days. Of course, the carefree-ness was a direct cause of the AIDS epidemic in the ’80s. Sigh.
  In any event, John Ritter was a genius when it came to physical comedy…

• Twin Peaks
  Watched the first couple eps, found it too weird and off-putting to continue. Pretty much my take on everything David Lynch is involved in.

• Twitch City
  Never heard of it.

• Unfabulous
• Ugly Betty
• Veronica Mars
• Weeds
• Whose Line is it Anyway? (US)
• Whose Line is it Anyway? (UK)
• Will and Grace
• Wings
• Xena: Warrior Princess
  My earlier comment about Hercules applies here, too. I watched every week, and it’s all pretty much a blur now. I do remember thinking it strayed much farther into “you’ve got to be kidding me” territory than Herc did. How many times did Xena die and come back anyhow? Unless a character is a demigod or has the last name of MacLeod, they really shouldn’t do that more than once.

And that’s that. One thing I noticed: There are many, many shows on this list that I have most likely seen in their entirety, but I have no way to be absolutely certain of it. In particular, the sitcoms of the ’60s and ’70s ran more or less constantly in syndication as I was growing up, and I watched many of them daily, so I’d be surprised if I hadn’t seen every episode of, say, Bewitched or Happy Days. But that was a long time ago, before anyone was paying attention to such things and way before you could actually own a complete television series on home video of any format.
Which brings up an interesting question (well, interesting to me, anyhow): When did people start concering themselves with seeing shows in their entirety? Sci-fi fans have long had their published episode guides, of course, but most SF shows are pretty short-lived, so it wasn’t difficult to see all of them even after cancellation. However, I doubt anyone would’ve even wondered if they’d seen every episode of Diff’rent Strokes until fairly recently. Was it the rise of the affordable (and space-saving) DVD season set that changed our consciousness about this? Or maybe the shift toward more serialized programs that we’ve seen over the past 10 or 15 years?
Just something to mull over on a snowy December afternoon…