Monthly Archives: September 2009

And Now for Something Completely Non-Controversial

Or so I hope. It’s a photo of Sigourney Weaver eating a hot dog:

Sigourney Weaver at Tail o' the Pup

Why? I dunno. It amuses me, and I thought it might amuse my Loyal Readers. And after the day I had at work, and the heavy associations this day holds, and the earlier unpleasantness over Rep. Wilson, I figure we could all use some amusement.

Incidentally, the hot-dog-shaped hot-dog stand in the background is Tail o’ the Pup, a Los Angeles-area landmark and a well-known example of programmatic architecture, i.e., buildings that were made to look like other objects, usually the products sold inside them, like giant donuts and such. Sadly, the Pup has been MIA since 2005, when it was evicted from its old lot by development plans. It was supposedly placed into storage until it could be relocated, but it’s been four years now and I can’t find any news about it coming back. I hope it does eventually. The world needs a hot-dog stand that looks like a hot dog.

I visited Tail o’ the Pup shortly before it closed down, but I was on my way to the airport and had already lunched, so I only had a cherry Coke. That’s another reason I hope it eventually reopens, so I can actually experience eating a dog there…

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Seven Years On

[Ed. note: As you may have surmised from the title, I actually wrote this entry a year ago, but I chickened out of publishing it at that time. I know my views on this subject are, shall we say, unorthodox, and given how charged the political air was last year because of the upcoming election, I just didn’t want to risk picking a fight. Nor did I want to callously offend or hurt the feelings of anyone whose emotions about the tragedy were still raw. I was thinking in particular of Brian Greenberg, a Loyal Reader I’ve never met in the flesh but who, thanks to the magic of the Intertubes, I’ve come to consider a friend. I know Brian feels the wounds of 9/11 far more keenly than I ever could, because he’s physically close to the place where it happened. He sees the altered New York skyline every day, whereas I have the luxury and comfort of distance.

But even he notes in his thoughts today that the country is finally moving on. And that, as much as anything, is what prompted me to dust off this old ramble and open it up to public view now. Because it no longer feels as inflammatory as it used to. Maybe that’s because we have a new president and a different subject now dominates the public discourse; maybe it’s simply one more year of hindsight. Or perhaps I’m misjudging the situation and I’m about to set off a rhetorical bomb. I hope not…]

I wasn’t planning to write anything about the anniversary of 9/11 because — frankly, and at great risk of sounding like a heartless bastard — it’s not something I think about much anymore. Seriously, I drove past a grassy field filled with American flags this morning on my way to the train station and I actually had a moment where I thought to myself, “now what the hell is that all about?” I had utterly forgotten what today was. I guess that means I’ve moved on, eh?

The truth is, though, I never felt that connected to it to begin with. That’s not to say I felt nothing on that horrible day now seven years gone. I was shocked and horrified and scared, the same as everybody else. I live right below the approach lanes for Salt Lake International Airport — there are usually five planes stacked up in the distance to the south of my house, waiting to come in — and I remember how deeply unsettling the quiet was, how empty the sky was, during those first few days when there was no air travel. But where so many of my fellow Americans seemed to almost immediately transmute whatever they were feeling into belligerence — an unquenchable anger and the need to hit someone back hard — I felt only sorrow. For the dead, for our lost landmarks, and for the changes I knew would be coming. I’ve spent the last seven years feeling like a stranger in my own country, like something was wrong with me, because I just didn’t seem to be experiencing the same emotions, or at least the same intensity of emotions, as everybody around me.

Before I go any farther, let me state for the record that I mean no disrespect to anyone or their feelings or their losses. I don’t mean to diminish what anyone else felt or continues to feel as a result of 9/11. And I sure as hell don’t want to offend anyone. I’m just talking about my feelings, with the full knowledge that I am in an apparent minority on these matters.

Now here’s where I piss off a whole bunch of my readers anyway, by admitting that I am deeply uncomfortable with the way our country handles this anniversary.

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A Little Thought Exercise

I have neither the time nor the temperament right now for a big political debate, but I would like to pose a question:

What do you suppose would’ve happened a couple years ago if a Democrat had interrupted a major policy speech on the floor of the Senate by President George W. Bush to call him a liar, as Republican Representative Joe Wilson did to President Obama last night?

I’m pretty confident that Democrat would’ve been denounced as an unpatriotic, disrespectful boor, if not accused of outright treason. He would’ve been shamed into making multiple and ever-more humiliating apologies, because the first one would not suffice for the grievous offense he had committed against the very foundations of our Republic. Ultimately, if the right-wing talk-radio types had their way, that incautious man would’ve been hounded from office and sent back to wherever he came from with his tail between his legs.

But we all know that’s not going to happen to this Wilson jackass, don’t we? I admire President Obama for being a bigger man than myself and accepting Wilson’s half-assed and obviously insincere apology, but I’ve got to tell you, I’m extremely frustrated with the Republican double-standard right now. Or don’t they believe any longer that the presidency demands respect, even if you don’t like the president himself? Isn’t that what we kept hearing all through Dubya’s eight years at the helm? And if that’s no longer the case, what happened to change their minds?

Oh, I remember… a Democrat won the election. And in Republican minds, a Democratic president is never, ever, under any circumstances legitimate.

Look, I know a lot of people agree with Wilson, probably including some of my own readers. You’re wrong if you do, but you’re entitled to be wrong here in our great country. So go ahead and be wrong. Tell your friends what you think; write about it on your blog; shout it from street corners; call your Congressperson and tell them; hell, stitch it into a sampler and hang it on the wall, if that’s your sort of thing. But when you’re sitting on the floor of the Senate while the President is speaking, show some manners and some freaking class and hold your goddamned tongue.

And before anyone reminds me that the Dems booed Shrubbie during his 2005 State of the Union, yeah, I know. They were rude, too. The difference there is that they hadn’t spent eight years yammering on about how the president’s political opponents needed to show respect and deference to a man they couldn’t stand, only to turn around and do the same damn thing when the shoe was on the other foot. And anyway, doesn’t anyone remember the Repubs booing Clinton? Seems to me the truly bad manners started right around the time Newt Gingrich and his buddies swept into office and decided they were going to hold their breath and stamp their feet until they got they way.

All of which is much more than I intended to say when I started this. As I noted, I’m very frustrated with all the bullshit right now, and with the Democrats’ perennial inability to effectively counter it…

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Something You Don’t Hear Every Day

In my office just a few minutes ago, I overheard someone say, “Oh, to be a lexicographer.”

You’ve got to admire that level of individuality in one’s career dreams…

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Well, That’s a Relief…

I got a bit of a start this morning when the local news reported that a woman who more-or-less matches the description of my friend Cheno’s wife had been hit by a car while jogging only a couple blocks from the Cheno home. I know Mrs. Cheno is a runner, and even though the age of the still-unidentified victim was said to be 10 years too old, I wondered if the police and TV reporters might have made a mistake and it was really her being loaded into a LifeFlight helicopter. Being the paranoid, er, concerned friend that I am, I felt compelled to make a quick phone call, just to be sure. Whoever the unfortunate jogger was, it wasn’t Mrs. Cheno.

Which is great news for me and my friends, but I feel bad for the anonymous woman who’s in the hospital while her own friends and family go blithely about their day with no idea that someone they care about is fighting for her life right now…

UPDATE: The Tribune is reporting that the jogger has died from “massive head trauma.” The police believe they’ve identified her and are awaiting the arrival of a husband for confirmation. Jesus… I can’t begin to imagine getting a phone call asking you to come verify the identity of a mate you’d shared breakfast with and kissed goodbye only a few hours earlier.

As weird and potentially disrespectful as this next thought may sound, I find myself wondering what she was listening to on the iPod she was wearing at the time of the accident. Years ago, I wrote a short story in which someone dies in a traffic accident while the most ridiculous and overblown pop tune I could think of at the time — Meat Loaf’s “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” — played on a jukebox in a nearby bar. It must happen all the time, when you think about it, people dying to the sound of inappropriate, silly, or offensive music… especially nowadays when music is so ubiquitous in our all-entertainment-all-the-time culture. It’s a haunting image for me… you’re running or walking or shopping, whatever, preoccupied by the mundane thoughts and daily business that eats up most of our lives, listening to the stupid pap that we all have on for background noise while we dream of the cool things we’ll do one of these days, if only we can get through one more day of the usual rut, and then spang!, it’s all over. No glamour, no meaning, no big resolution, no swelling soundtrack theme and slow dissolve to the next scene, only the Archies crooning on about sugar and honey. It reminds me of an old episode of M*A*S*H, oddly enough, the one where one of Hawkeye’s paramours goes for a walk after their tryst and steps on a mine, and the last words in her diary are that her head is filled with thoughts of him. And another episode of the same show, in which Margaret sums it all up: “It never fails to amaze me. One minute you’re alive, the next you’re dead.”

Things to consider on a beautiful Wednesday afternoon in early fall…

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My 50 Concerts Meme

Here’s another Facebook meme, courtesy of my friend and co-worker Waylon. The idea this time around is to list 50 musical artists or bands you’ve seen in concert. As with that movie meme from the other day, you’re not supposed to think too hard about this, but to list only the first 50 acts that occur to you. Of course, that presumes you’ve been to at least 50 concerts, which is a pretty unlikely situation, I think, for most people. But even if that’s in the realm of possibility, listing 50 music shows off the top of your head isn’t as easy as it sounds; I’ve kept a scrapbook of ticket stubs and reviews ever since my very first concert back in 1981, but without having it here beside me to refer to, I had a devil of a time remembering who-all I’ve seen. I couldn’t quite manage 50 names even when I included the handful of memorable opening acts I’ve seen, but I’m not sure if that means I haven’t actually seen 50 discrete musical artists or if I’m just forgetting somebody.
In any event, here are the results, along with the usual commentary, starting with the original rules:

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When the World Was Young

I ought to be in bed, catching up on sleep. I can’t remember the last time I got a full eight hours’ worth. But instead, I sit here in the wee hours of the last day of the last weekend of summer, clicking my way across the Internet, in search of… what? Enlightenment? Absolution? Distraction from the existential horror of it all? Maybe I’m just trying to stave off the inevitable advance of the calendar for just a few more minutes.

Here’s a song that’s been running through my head for a good part of the day. The lyrics are typically Zeppelin-esque mumbo-jumbo, but the tone captures my mood pretty well…

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Now This Is Rock and Roll!

I was driving home last night about 12:30, with the top down and the light of a nearly full moon diffusing through a scrim of thin clouds. The air temperature was right where I like it, hovering just this side of being too chilly for shirt sleeves, the pleasant crispness that still signals to me that it’s time to get headed back to school, even though I’ve been finished with that chapter of my life for 20 years now. And this was on the radio:

Ahhh. These are the rare moments when I feel the most like the person I used to think I was supposed to be.

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Strangelove, or, How I Went to a New Wave Concert and Lived to Tell the Tale

If I were to fire up my time-traveling DeLorean and go tell my 17-year-old self that one day he would more-or-less willingly attend a Depeche Mode concert, I can only imagine the poor kid would sit up sleepless at night wondering when the early-onset dementia was going to hit. Depeche Mode? Really? But… but they’re a New Wave band!

You see, back in the days when the kind of music you listened to actually mattered, I self-identified as a rocker. Not a metalhead, mind you — my tastes were never that extreme — but the stuff that most strongly resonated with me was almost exclusively guitar-based, and mostly of that simple, feel-good variety that’s all about cars and summer nights and breaking free of whatever’s holding you down, about illicit adventures and giving the finger to authority, and, most of all, it was about sex. It was rebellious and restless; it vibrated its way into your bones and affected you at a gut level… or, in the case of the really good stuff, a bit south of there. To this day, a good rock song can for three minutes and a few odd seconds make me feel mean, or masculine, or sexy, or simply like I want to mash the accelerator down a little harder and feel my car surge forward like nothing can stop us.

New Wave never did any of that for me.

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You Know You’re in Utah…

This is probably funny (or sad, take your pick) only to residents of my fair state (or at least to people who know it well), but I can’t resist passing it along anyway. From Paul Rolly’s column today in the Salt Lake Tribune, a Jeff Foxworthy-style reader comment in response to something Rolly wrote a couple days ago:

You know you’re in Utah when ยป The lead-footed set the speed limits, teetotalers are in charge of alcoholic beverage control, planning and zoning is handed over to the developers, the descendants of polygamists campaign to restrict marriage to one man and one woman, and you’re told if you don’t like it you can just leave.

Too true, too true.

That last one is especially irksome to those of us who were born and raised here, who love the landscape and climate and history of this place, and who have roots here every bit as deep as any Church authority, but who don’t happen to share the prevailing cultural and political mindset of this place. Uh, no, I’m not going anywhere, this is my home, too. How about YOU learn to play nice with others?

Not that I’m bitter or anything.

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