Another Take on the Ports Controversy

Detective Yeti has written a wickedly funny (if incredibly geeky) satire of this whole sale-of-the-ports-to-Dubai kerfuffle. If you don’t get the joke, you’re obviously not familiar enough with the films of the incomparable Jeff Bridges:

Sark today sought to quell the growing controversy over his decision to grant the MCP control of several major ports throughout the region.

 

“I believe that this arrangement with the Master Control Program should go forward,” Sark told reporters aboard Solar Sailer One. He emphasized that security would continued to be handled by Tank and Recognizer programs, with the MCP only be in charge of port operations.

 

But Dumont, guardian of the I/O towers, voiced skepticism. “I could understand ceding authority over ports 21 and 80,” said Dumont. “But port 443? That’s supposed to be secure!”

 

The public’s reaction to the plan has also been overwhelmingly negative. “No no no,” said a bit upon hearing the news. “No no no no.” Others were more blunt. “Sark should be de-rezzed for even proposing this,” said Ram, a financial program.

 

Sark, who has repeatedly denied having ties to the MCP, has insisted that the hand-over go through, and says that he will vigorously resist any effort to block it. But programs such as Yori are equally adamant that the deal be scuttled. “My User,” she said, “have we already forgotten the lessons of 1000222846?”

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4 comments on “Another Take on the Ports Controversy

  1. chenopup

    If this means the import of Japanese Light Cycles to the US, I’m all for it 🙂

  2. jason

    I could go for one of those groovy solar-sail ships, myself. Or the ability to teleport around the system. Or heck, just women in form-fitting, glow-in-the-dark jumpsuits with leg warmers. I’d be all over that…

  3. Jen B

    Hee!
    I need to see that movie again.

  4. jason

    Sure you do, Jen – everyone needs to see that movie again. 🙂 I’m probably going to watch it this week myself…