British Conspiracy Beliefs

Just in case you were wondering, here is a list of the top ten conspiracy theories believed by 1,000 British adults surveyed in connection with the new X Files movie:

  1. Area 51 exists to investigate aliens (48%)
  2. 9/11 was orchestrated by the US government (38%)
  3. Apollo landing was a hoax (35%)
  4. Diana and Dodi were murdered (32%)
  5. The Illuminati secret society and masons are trying to take over the world (25%)
  6. Scientologists rule Hollywood (17% )
  7. Barcodes are really intended to control people (7%)
  8. Microsoft sends messages via Wingdings (6%)
  9. US let Pearl Harbour happen (5%)
  10. The world is run by dinosaur-like reptiles (3%)

For the record, I personally think all of these notions are bunk, and numbers two, three, and nine are downright offensive in both their ignorance and their cynicism (the Apollo missions were among the greatest achievements ever in the history of our ridiculous, half-savage species and should be revered as such, and the idea that any government would knowingly allow or even purposefully cause the deaths of thousands of its own citizens to secretly advance a political agenda is repugnant; not impossible, mind you, but so impossibly vile and complex in execution that I can’t believe they’d get away with it for long). Nevertheless, this list is pretty interesting, isn’t it? Notice that six of the ten items have something to do with the United States directly, and three of the remaining four are transnational. Only one conspiracy theory is uniquely British in its subject matter or, presumably, its origin. Come on, Brits, surely there’re more dark secrets in the halls of Westminster than just the assassination of Diana… it’s like you’re not even trying!

Incidentally, I understand those reptilian aliens who run the world are supposed to have a major underground base right here in Utah. Google around and you’ll find mentions of Dugway Proving Grounds, secret cloning facilities at the University of Utah, and, of course, connections with the LDS church, or at least with the Temple in downtown SLC. My personal favorite story is the “ancient tunnel network” that supposedly connected into Crossroads Mall — allegedly the site of many encounters with creepy alien and paranormal stuff. Of course, the block where Crossroads once stood is now a massive construction pit. No doubt just a front operation to fill in or otherwise conceal those pesky tunnels…

(Via.)

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6 comments on “British Conspiracy Beliefs

  1. Cranky Robert

    I really am shocked that so many people (in this country and abroad) believe that the U.S. government was behind 9/11. It’s not just offensive, it’s stupid.

  2. jason

    Total agreement on that one, Robert. I’m rather ashamed to say that the idea seems to have a lot of traction here in my home state… which is weird, since this state is also the firmest and last bastion of George W. supporters in the country. One of the biggest proponents of 9/11 hokum is in fact a former BYU professor named Steven Jones.
    A lot of conspiracy theories seem to thrive in Utah, oddly enough. I had a history teacher back in high school who suggested the Pearl Harbor thing in class. That was the first time I remember thinking that a teacher was full of shit. And of course I’m always running into people who think there’s a prototype car somewhere that runs on water, but it’s being suppressed by various organizations (the government, the oil companies, those damn reptlioid aliens, etc.).

  3. Cranky Robert

    I sometimes wonder if conspiracy nuts latch onto this stuff because it’s the only thing they can imagine making life interesting. I’m reading Vincent Bugliosi’s book Reclaiming History, which is a defense of the Warren Commission findings on JKF’s assassination. He says that it deflates the mythology around JFK’s when you accept that he was, quite simply, killed by a nut with good aim.

  4. jason

    Yes, but the thing with terrible events like JFK or 9/11 is that the scale of the event — the assassination of a president, the destruction of two iconic skyscrapers, the bombing of our naval fleet — make it seem impossible (to a lot of people) that the simplest, most mundane explanation could be the true one. The mythology grows because the the event is so outsized that it doesn’t fit with the “smallest” answer, i.e., it’s difficult for many people to accept that the cause really was something as small as a nut with a rifle, or a group of nuts who seized control of four airplanes, or… you get my idea.
    As for the really whacked-out stuff like aliens and Illuminati and such… I don’t know, maybe it does make life more interesting for the believers. Perhaps it gives them a sense of importance or purpose because they know “the truth” that the rest of us are ignorant of. Maybe their lives are so miserable that they think there must be some big reason why, aside from simply the obvious…

  5. Ilya Burlak

    I don’t have anything different to say, so I’ll use a different word. I find it downright appalling that so many believe in items 2 and 3.

  6. jason

    A good word, Ilya… 🙂