An exchange between myself and The Girlfriend at my house Saturday night:

Me: Want something to drink?

The GF: What’ve you got?

Me: The usual… Coke Zero, Caffeine-free Diet Coke, Sprite, water, milk…

(beat)

Me: I don’t know if the milk is still good, though. It’s been in there for a while. The cat seems okay with it.

The GF: The cat licks his own balls.

You can’t argue with logic like that. Anne had a Caffeine-free Diet Coke.